What about the price of Ben and Jerry's?

With the gas prices taking a turn for the better, I have been left with the following question...

Why is no one complaining about the rising prices of Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream?

I don't drive, so it's not the fluctuating gas prices hitting my pocket, but i do consume vast quantities of Ben and Jerry's.  And with the rising rate in obesity, I can't be the only one concerned with this issue.  When i went to CityCo the other day, one pint of ice cream cost me $5.49!!!  Are you serious?  Can you imagine if we ran our cars off of Ben and Jerry's?!?!  With eight pints to the gallon, that would be $43.92/gallon!!!  Now that's a real crisis.  My sisters puny 96 Saturn would cost her $483.12 per fill-up with the car's 11 gallon tank.  Compare that with the Massachusetts state gas price average of $2.46 (as of 2 November 2008).  My sister has to pay only $27.06 to fill up her tank with gas. 

Now this is the real crisis people.

i figure the reason B&J's costs so much is that it's main ingredient, milk, has gone up in price.  Now i just googled why milk's price has gone up so much and it seems to be because the cost of corn has gone up because of the demand for ethanol.  And we all know why the demand for corn has increased.  Higher prices for corn means there exists a greater cost for care of cows, which corresponds to the higher price of the milk, directly resulting in the higher price for my Phish Food.  

So this is my plea:

FOR THE SAKE OF BEN AND JERRY'S, EVERYONE INSTALL SOLAR PANELS AND WIND TURBINES TO REDUCE THE DEMAND FOR ETHANOL WHICH WOULD LOWER THE COST OF CORN WHICH WOULD REDUCE THE BURDEN ON DAIRY FARMERS AND THEREFORE MY ICE CREAM WILL COST LESS.

From my logic, i have also concluded that installation of alternative energy may indirectly hinder America's fight on obesity.  People would be able to purchase more Chubby Hubby and hubbies will remain chubby.  But i ask you this... which is worse: ecological irresponsibility or high cholesterol?  Only a selfish person would choose the latter.

Sudoku Battles in Physics Class

Favorite activity in physics class? Sudoku Battles!!! Participants race against their opponents in an effort to be the first to finish their Sudoku puzzle. Each puzzle is supplied by BU's beloved Freep. One student comments that even after the competition, "The fun continues... Because now we have an entire Freep to read during class!"

While it is common to see students battle during more boring classes, some prefer to not battle and instead complete the puzzle in their own time. One student, prefering to remain unknown, stated, "Yeah, i guess battling is fun, but, like, when i come to physics class i'm already stressed enough, you know? Cuz, like, i have no idea what is going on. So i like to just, um, read the Freep front to cover and do the Sudoku on my own time. I gain knowledge on the current events on campus. I also saw in an ad that i could sell my eggs for $15,000! Sounds like a good deal... I'm going to look into it."

Parents should be aware that their children are fulling benefitting from the BU experience by maximizing the knowledge gained during lectures.

Really? Come on...

In linear algebra, I usually sit behind this kid with a rather large body that prevents me from seeing the board, lest i struggle in my seat. Deciding enough was enough, I arrived to class early ensuring that i would sit in the front row...

Victory! One front row seat was available when i entered the classroom, and i quickly claimed it as my own. However, my strategy of arriving early was FUTILE. When Big Kid showed up, he stopped approximately 5 feet in front of me, glared at me, and proceeded to pull the desk from directly behind me in the row. Slightly puzzled, i watched him situate the desk RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I started laughing, hoping he would get the hint. However, Big Kid did not.

Possible motives for this horrific crime? Well, Big Kid seems to be best friends with Awkward Couple, a pair of freshman lovers that must sit together every class. I believe that Big Kid is secretly jealous of Awkward Couple therefore feels compelled to sit by them. Three points on one line do not make a love triangle, Big Kid. Give the rest of us a chance to see something other than your large back.

I have attached a picture of this atrocity to add some perspective.

R.I.P, Melville II

Melville II the House Centipede passed away on October 1st, 2008 in his water bottle in Room 501 of Shelton Hall, Boston.

Born of a poor family in the walls of Shelton Hall, Melville II was left to hatch alone at the age of a 30 minutes. Deciding to overcome the cold obstacles of abandonment, Melville found solace in the humidity and warmth of Room 501's bathroom. He was discovered by a screaming Mel Zile and captured by resident Betty Chan and was soon taken in as a pet.

Melville is famously known as the victor of the Great Arachnid Trials, which culminated in the Battle of October 2 when he defeated the Dread Spider Christopher after an epic fight. It was only several days later when Melville passed. When pet co owner Moira inquired upon Melville's death, pet co owner Betty replied, "It did not look good, his legs were everywhere... I should have changed his bottle...it could have been the water in [the bottle]."

Melville will always be remembered for his energy and unyielding pursuit of the truth. He was moral and strong. He has once been compared to both Mother Teresa and Arnold Schwarzenegger. R.I.P, Melville II. You were an amazing pet, and an even better friend.

Melville II is survived by Moira, Betty, Mel, and Christy.